Daily Gratitude

Shoes!

2009-08-27T20:02:00.003-05:00

It has been a long time since I bought "real" shoes. I've tried to make do with Walmart Earth Spirit and Dr. Scholl's brand shoes, but my feet are killing me! So I headed downtown to Anderson's Shoes and bought some comfort shoes. I bought TWO pairs of Danskos. I tried on the first pair, and they felt great, so I tried on a second pair. Hopefully, that will help the foot aches I've been having. The sales person says they will hold up "forever." I sure hope so! I like the slogan: "not the only pair of shoes, but my favorite pair." I hope these shoes live up to the name!

Last day of summer vacation

2009-08-11T20:38:00.002-05:00

School starts for me tomorrow. I'm not sure I'm "ready." I haven't felt like school is about to start. I don't have plans or ideas for the coming year. Well, actually, I do. I am going to stress the interactive notebooks as a methodology to increase student achievement. I have to complete two GBE goals. I wonder if the PBIS team can be one of the goals?

It was a productive summer. We are mostly settled in the new house. We put up a lot of produce--25 quarts of tomatoes (or perhaps one or two more), peaches, salsa, pepper jelly, and spaghetti sauce. We will probably get some peas and maybe some late corn, if the weather holds out and we get some much needed rain. It's stormy tonight, and we've gotten some rain off and on.

HIking in Pisgah Forest

2009-08-02T21:06:00.002-05:00

We went hiking today, focusing on some new trails for us. We went to the English Chapel in the Pisgah National Forest in the Davidson River Recreation Area. I discovered the site through the geocaching web site. That was the easy hike! Then we went looking for a waterfall and ended up at the Looking Glass Mountain Rock Trail. We started hiking, not knowing how far we needed to go or what we were going to see or even the difficulty of the trail. I think I made it almost three-quarters of the way up the trail. The boys reached the summit. I had to stop and rest! We made a mistake--we forgot to take water with us, and the humidity was awful. A gentleman hiker was coming down. We chatted for a bit, and he offered me some water, which I accepted gladly. Then I started down the trail back to the truck. I hadn't been back long when ambulances and rescue squads started coming into the parking lot. They organized a crew to start up the trail, looking for someone who was in distress/unknown medical. I immediately said lots of prayers for the boys' safety. The team that went up first found John and Aaron, and they asked them if they had seen a female hiker who was in distress. The boys told the rescue team that their mom had gotten tired (yep) but should be back in the parking lot at the truck. Sure enough, the rescue team was looking for ME! The hiker had gone to the ranger station and told them that there was a female hiker on the Looking Glass Rock Trail who was in distress. Well, I was tired, I was thirsty, but I was not really in distress--at least not requiring medical care! But it is nice to know that strangers do take care of others and that there are rescue workers willing to take the risks to check on hikers! We have had a really good laugh about this!

Insomnia

2009-07-28T00:21:00.002-05:00

What do you do when you can't go to sleep? That's my problem tonight. I have been to bed, but tossed and turned. I wrote stories in my head, counted sheep and blessings and backwards from 100. If anything, those things made me more awake. So, here I am at 1:30 in the morning reading my Bible and writing on my blog. What else can I do to make myself go to sleep?

It is Tuesday now, and it will be a busy day. I have to go out to Aaron's school to get him registered for the fall. Then it's back here to get the house cleaned up, especially the kitchen. We have made a mess with our canning! John wants to see the Harry Potter movie, but I don't know. With his work schedule, it's going to be tough to make it there at a reasonable time. And then there's the battle about Aaron seeing it with us. He went to see it today, and he says he wants to see it again, but he doesn't want to go tomorrow. Well, he does want to go; he just wants to see another movie instead. I don't think so.

So, perhaps the sleep is starting to kick in now, and I can get the rest I need.

I really need to do this. . . .

2009-07-21T08:32:00.003-05:00

I am truly neglecting my blog. I haven't written here or in my paper journal in such a long time. I haven't scrapbooked or been creative in forever. So I need to get started.

today--

I will write for 30 minutes, some time during the day
I will take some pictures/make photographs.
I will plan some scrapbook time.
I will read something.
I will take care of me.

Home Improvement

2009-07-07T21:16:00.002-05:00

I think I need to improve my blog home as well. Today, I weeded the flower beds around the front porch, put down pine straw, and then stained the desking on the front porch and the deck at the atrium door. I am covered in Cabot Federal Blue stain! And I am tired. And I have no pictures--yet.

We are settling in quite well. I think tonight was the first night we had a carry-out supper--Chinese, because I was just too tired to cook. The boys were out--Aaron at Patience's and John working at Bi-Lo.

Tomorrow, I start going to the gym again. Just Us Girl, here I come.

As soon as the ball game is over, I'm going to bed. I am sleepy. And I will quit rambling.

Home again

2009-06-03T20:38:00.002-05:00

We are home. Sometimes, it doesn't feel like home. I wake up sometimes and think I'm in some fancy hotel, somewhere else other than my home. Other times, I cannot imagine being in any other place. I am reminded every day that God is good. We are making it slowly. We are recovering. We are getting settled. Right now, the important thing is to "live with" the house for awhile. I feel like I have the things we need. I do want a book case in the office, and I want a china cabinet for the dining room. I need some lamps. But we have the necessities.

I think learning to live with what I have is the best lesson I could have learned from the fire. I really want a lot of stuff, but I don't need those things. I have to learn restraint. I have to learn simplicity. Everything is good.

Nerves

2009-05-22T14:12:00.003-05:00

More EOC testing at school. . . . more madness, and more "miscommunication" and misunderstandings. Oh well, it's over for today. Tuesday will be "better." At least I know what my assignment for the day is supposed to be: monitor the hall at the three hundred wing.

The house is ready for move-in, I hope. The inspection is scheduled for 4:00 today. I just hope we pass.

Now, the musing on the Blackberry. I got one in January when I upgraded my phone. I thought it would help me keep organized, and it has to an extent. It's been good to access my home email with the Blackberry and to use the Internet. It has made something easier. But you know, I'm just not in love it. Maybe I will love it one day, but it hasn't happened yet. I like being able to be in touch with emails and such like, but. . . .

So, the bell is about to ring, and this week is over. . . . Thank goodness.

The House, Part 2

2009-05-21T11:06:00.002-05:00

The house, for all intents and purposes, is finished, but unfurnished. We should get certificate of occupancy on Friday, and we plan to move in on Saturday. Furniture deliveries are scheduled. Phone service is being reestablished. DirecTV is being reestablished. There's just too much to do! I need a secretary. I think I'm going to let Mem decorate my house for me! I'm too spacy. I know what I want, but it's hard to get it together.

There will be photos posted soon.

The house

2009-04-18T21:45:00.002-05:00

It's under way. The foundation is pretty much finished. Next week, Shannon's crew will put the "top" and the flashing on it, and make sure it's ready to receive the boxes when they are set. We have at least a one-day delay right now. It will come on April 29 and should be set on the 30th. The sub is "hired" and I am already ready for the day! Then it's off to the furniture stores to find the "right" furniture.

I am taking Allison Tyler Jones's photography class. So far, it's good, but I don't have the time--or rather, I'm not making the time to practice the principles she's teaching. I am loving the comments. Her's were rather gentle on mine--my photo was "heavenly," with a story of the cobwebs as well. I'm not sure what she means, though. I think it was a good photo.

I am just not a portrait person. I know I'll need to stretch myself, and I know that the principles she's teaching will apply to anything I photograph, not just portraits. so, now, I really need to get busy with the practice.

"Birthing" a house

2009-04-14T09:54:00.001-05:00

This week, it's beginning for real: the loan was approved yesterday. The foundation is supposed to go in this week, but it's raining. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day. The delivery date is April. 28, and the setup date is April 29. Then nearly two to three weeks after that for move-in.

Whew!

Sunday Afternoon and the Return to the World of the Living

2009-03-29T19:34:00.002-05:00

I think I have returned to the world of the living. I am still trying to recover my strength from this "ick." Tomorrow it's back to work. I have to figure out what we're doing and where we are in both sections of English 3. I'm totally lost.

It's been a relaxing day, really. No pressures to get anything done, no pressures to be anywhere. It's a day that I've needed for awhile.

We're still waiting for official word from JJ and John regarding the house. I'm ready to "move on." It's time to know something for sure one way or the other. Well, we know we have the loan now, and we know we have the house. But we don't know WHEN we're going to get it. I hope we'll see some action within the next two weeks. I figure that once JJ starts the foundation, it will be at least six weeks before we can move in. I am getting excited and anxious and scared. This is a major step forward, but at the same time it's a scary step. The "nightmare" of losing everything is just about over, and it's time to rebuild and start over, something that we can do.

Friday sick day musings

2009-03-27T12:03:00.003-05:00

Well, I'm still at home. Still fighting off the "ick." It's more than the crud; this virus is "icky." I am doing better; I managed to clean the bathroom, and I'm doing laundry--slowly. I'm also editing some pictures. Last Sunday, I walked through pasture behind the house, something I haven't done in more than 25 years. It's odd how much is still the same, but yet there are changes. The hills are still as steep as they were when I was growing up. The quietness of the pasture is still "loud" and soothing and comforting. It seems that I hear the traffic on the highway more now, perhaps because there is more traffic than it was when I was growing up here.

Much of my childhood centered around living on a "working farm." Mama and Daddy still grow their own vegetables, but Daddy no longer farms for livestock as he did when I was a child. In many ways, we were very self-sufficient because of our rural lifestyle, and to a great extent we still are. It was certainly much easier to walk through the pasture without having to watch where I stepped! I didn't have to pay attention to the cow pies or the horse dung! But that being said, there was a moment of sadness when I saw the abandoned farm machinery in the pasture--the old combine (or was it the hay baler?), the hayrake, other implements scattered around the pasture. Daddy just turned 82, and he still works a garden. He has the two Ford tractors that he uses regularly. He still uses some of the implements I saw, but others are abandoned to rust and decay. Truly, I am seeing the end of an era of self-sufficiency. My own children will not have that life unless they make it for themselves. It's no longer a "norm" even for rural South Carolina. Of course, though we were somewhat self-sufficient, Daddy still had to work another job to support the family. He was in construction for more than 30 years--all my life, certainly, and retired when John was only a couple of years old. I don't think Aaron had been born. Even after his retirement, he did continue to farm, but gradually, he began to phase out the acreage he planted until he finally sold his livestock. Now, he maintains the garden beside the house and plants a few deer plots.

Tired of being sick

2009-03-26T15:25:00.002-05:00

It's official: I've the "ick." It's not the flu, but it's like the flu. I feel miserable. The doctor says it takes about 5-7 days for this mess to run its course. Well, that means I've got two more days of feeling really lousy. My legs feel weak, my head sometimes feels like it's going to explode, or else that it's going to float away. I get tired too easily. Good news is that I was able to get a sub without any difficulty today, and I got one of the good ones. I should be back on Monday.

I worked on our taxes this afternoon, and I don't know if I've done them correctly or not. I was able to get a credit for the fire damage. I don't know if I did it correctly or not, but I tried. I may go back and revise it some. I don't know. I hate doing taxes, I really do. It's no fun.

Maybe I will feel like scrapbooking a bit tomorrow or this weekend. I need to do something with the stuff that I'm accumulating.

Good news: the appraisal is in at 190.000, and Jenny called the factory and told them to "pull the trigger." That should start the building process, and hopefully, we will get an estimated delivery date soon. I am so ready. We should be able to close on the loan next week. I hope so.

Another Sick Day

2009-03-26T06:38:00.001-05:00

I am at home again--sick. I feel almost like I have the flu--body aches, headache, very tired; weak knees, a little stuffy. This is no fun! I'm missing the poet visit and the opening of the book fair. Yuck, yuck, yuck.

Lazy Day

2009-03-25T12:50:00.002-05:00

So, yesterday, I got sick at school. I mean, really sick--so sick that I had leave in the middle of the day. I came home and went straight to bed. I put in for a sub for today, and fortunately one picked up the absence. I am recuperating today--still weak, still having some chills, but able to sit up and eat. I had toast for lunch. Hopefully, I'll be able to eat something more substantial tonight (but definitely NOT pizza!). I am just lazing around this afternoon, hoping to recuperate enough to go back to school tomorrow.

New Challenges

2009-03-20T21:54:00.002-05:00

I really should be going to bed, but instead, I'm typing on my blog. Sheesh! What a social life!

So many new challenges in the last few months since the house fire. I have to work on the taxes and get them filed. I wonder if I can take a deduction for casualty? The appraiser will be finished with his work Monday, and the loan should go through. I hope we can close this week, but I won't hold my breath.

School is, well--school. I have one set of students who are just about impossible to teach, and they know it. I really dread my first block class. I'm negative about them; they're negative about me. Perhaps if they were just a little willing to give something to the class, I would feel better. I'm glad I have other classes that I really enjoy.

Dr. Rosenberg asked me if I would be interested in teaching the Holocaust semester course. I will definitely jump at that chance! I really want that elective. It's meaningful (at least to me), and who knows? Maybe I can arrange a trip to Washington, DC to the Holocaust Museum. I want to see the entire exhibit this time, not just Daniel's Story. I think it's an important unit of study, and one that I miss teaching.

That was the one good thing about this week. Well, Aaron did get his braces off on Monday, and I had a couple of quiet days, and John had a wonderful Singers concert, and I did get to sing "Beautiful Savior" with the choir. . . . Okay, so the week wasn't so bad after all.

Tomorrow is Daddy's 82nd birthday. It's not possible that he's that old. I don't think he looks 82, but he is. Mama will be 74 in May. She's having cataract surgery in April. When did my parents start aging? There are times when I can see how Daddy is aging, but Mama does not seem to age, except on a night like tonight when she is stressed.

So, challenges and possibilities. . . . That's the mantra for the weekend.

Quiet Sunday mornings

2009-03-15T05:25:00.002-05:00

I love quiet Sunday mornings before everyone gets up and the rush to get ready for church begins. It's time for my brain to rest for awhile. I can plan my day, or I can just sit and do nothing for awhile. This morning, I've checked my email already (mostly "junk"), and I've looked at my blog reader to see if there are any new posts to follow. I'm going to look at the websites for some new scrapbooking stuff. I have a cute blackboard album that I want to figure out what to do with. I have some ideas. I also have some new Tim Holtz stamps. I can't wait to use them. Then I need to hit the showers. And figure out lunch. . . . and the rest of the day. I will have it to myself: Grady is working; John is going back to the college, and Aaron will be going to the All-State Band Concert with Patience's family. Mama and Daddy are still at Bennett's Point, in spite of the weather.

So, on to the search. . . .

Sunday Afternoon

2009-03-08T14:42:00.003-05:00

At last--a "lazy" Sunday afternoon. It's warm enough that I should be outside enjoying the sunshine especially after last Sunday's "snow." Yes, it did snow, but there was no accumulation, and we had a snow day without snow on Monday.

Yesterday, we had an awesome experience at the Newberry College Jazz Festival. Whoever knew that harmonicas could be jazz instruments? But Howard Levy proved that it is an instrument for the jazz band! Although it's not jazz, just listen to this!

Wednesday evening

2009-03-04T21:52:00.003-05:00

Boy, is it quiet in here tonight! No TV, no talking, no noise--just Mama tapping on her new cell phone and me tapping on laptop keys. I did some creating tonight--nothing special, really. I made a few tags with some Bible verses on them--verses that really spoke to me over the weekend. I had a near meltdown this afternoon after reading the emails about John Owen. I'm just simply disappointed in him, but maybe things are supposed to be this slow. I feel like everything is going to be okay, eventually, but I'm getting impatient. I want things to be settled now. I'm ready to start the house; I'm ready to move in; I'm ready to have my own home again

I'm not going to be up much longer. I spent the last two nights watching "The Bachelor." I was disappointed last night. There wasn't anything really new on it. And tonight on ET, they said that not a single one of the matches from that series have made it to the wedding. I'm not really that surprised. Can you really make a lasting match in such a public and perhaps even scripted way? I don't know, but I wouldn't think so.

Tomorrow night, there is a band boosters meeting. I don't think there's anything on the schedule for Friday night. Saturday is the Jazz Festival at the college and skeet shooting with the Scouts. Then we'll be back on schedule on Sunday. John goes on Singers tour and on Spring Break.

It's going to be a busy week.

The Snow Day that Wasn't

2009-03-03T12:16:00.002-05:00

Okay, yesterday was a "snow day," except there was no snow! Actually, it did snow Sunday night--thick, heavy flakes, but none of them stuck to the warm, rain-soaked ground. School was cancelled for the day. In a way, I was glad. I needed a day to "chill." I took Aaron back to the doctor for the fourth time since Feb. 2--first with pneumonia, then twice with the sore hip (three times if you count the trip to the emergency room), and yesterday with a really snotty nose (okay, sorry for the graphic nature of the description). Then we went grocery shopping. When we got home, Georgia and I scrapbooked all day. We made her a "book of days" calendar book. She had a blast! She decorated each page and started putting cards and things in it. She even made a birthday card for Kim. Who knows? Maybe I've recruited another scrapbooker!

Birthday

2009-02-25T10:42:00.002-05:00

It's that day again. I'm in the lab with my English 3 kids. They are doing some research and putting together PowerPoints for the Harlem Renaissance displays. I hear Billie Holiday playing on one computer. I suppose I'll be hearing the Duke in a little while.

Only two more days before I head to NC for Scrap Camp. Liz sent out the template for the calendar project. I haven't heard from anyone else about it. I'll take my stuff. I am ready for the retreat.

Blue Tuesday

2009-02-24T09:55:00.002-05:00

Not sure what's going on with me today. I am just really, really tired. We've had good news: our stamped plans should be in this week, and once, the builder receives them, he can start the foundation. We are still waiting for final word on the loan.

Aaron has had two negative xrays for a broken hip, but he's still in pain. The doctor told him to stay off of it as much as possible, so Grady got a doctor's excuse, and Aaron is at home resting today.

I'm still planning to go to Lutheridge on Friday, but if Aaron's not better, we may have to have an MRI done to find out exactly what's going on with his hip.

But, I'm just blue: I could sit here in class right now, and just cry--no real reason, just because I feel like it. I have a sinus headache that's throbbing away, and I'm tired. Maybe I need to go to bed really early tonight.

I'm just overwhelmed.

A Saturday Adventure

2009-02-22T21:49:00.002-05:00

It's getting to be a habit! I had Aaron in the ER again last night. He fell while skateboarding Saturday afternoon, not once, but three times. When he came home from Ryan's, he was in so much pain that I took him to Dr. Carroll. He thought Aaron might have a broken hip. So, we headed to Baptist Hospital for xrays. The xrays appear to be normal--no broken bones, but he's still hurting today. Dr. Carroll told Daddy that he just doesn't think he's that wrong, and he wants to see Aaron in a week or so. I'm trying to get Aaron to use the crutches to keep the weight off his leg, but he's being a little stubborn. I have a feeling that even if he does leave tomorrow with the crutches, he will probably leave them in the car. I just hope that he doesn't do permanent damage to his leg.

The Weekend

2009-02-20T16:07:00.002-05:00

I have a few quiet minutes to myself this afternoon. Aaron and his friends are going to the Winter Jam Christian rock concert tonight; Mama and Daddy are preparing the venison supper at the community center for tonight's fundraiser, and Grady is still at the old house cleaning up in preparation for the new house. We finished our professional development day early, and I was home before 4:00! I really need this quiet time to myself. I think I will be glad to have the new house and the one room that will be "mine"--the office. The more I think of Mama's idea of turning the breakfast nook into a small work area, the more I like it. I think that might be my scrap room, of sorts as well. I'll have to give all this thought.

This weekend--I know I have the usual chores to do. I would like to take time to ramble outside with the camera. I'm reading a book that is really as "master" class in photography. I'm just not doing the tutorials and assignments yet. I haven't been in the creative mode. I also need to finish organizing my scrapbooking supplies so that I'll have them ready to take with me next week. Next week this time, I hope I'm at Lutheridge, settling into the scrap room, and setting up for a good weekend of fellowship and fun.

Of course, this weekend, I have to help Aaron with the children's sermon. I wonder if I can find the lectionary for this coming Sunday on line?

Now, I've had a snack; I've had time to reflect in the blog, and now it's time to fold laundry.

Book of Days

2009-02-19T22:23:00.003-05:00

I thought I had posted this last night, but I'm not sure where it is. So, I will try it again tonight.

These are some photos of this year's book of days. I haven't worked much on it recently, but perhaps I will do some this weekend. It's flexible in that it doesn't have to be completed all at once.

I'm posting pictures of the cover, the inside cover, and the January and February pages.

Christmas again?

2009-02-16T16:28:00.002-05:00

Grady sent a text message that UPS delivered three boxes to the house site today. I took the Explorer over so that he could change the oil and got the boxes--and it is Christmas all over again: a new Toshiba Satellite laptop computer, an Epson PictureMate Dash photo printer, a Sony Cybershop digital camera, and an external hard drive--all part of the insurance settlement. I don't know which part of this shipment excites me more--the laptop or the PictureMate. I am setting up the Toshiba now. It's taking awhile, and somethings may have to wait until I get to school to use the wireless network there for some downloads. I'm excited.

Sunday musings

2009-02-15T15:27:00.002-05:00

It's a quiet Sunday. There's no school tomorrow because of the President's Day holiday. Boy, do I need it! I really ought to go into the dining room and work on some scrapbooking stuff. I made a journal/scrapbook for Aaron to give to Patience. She liked it. Aaron said she put the ticket stubs in one of the pockets and wrote "My First Date." Last night I put the gratitude journal together. I wondering if I can turn it into an energy journal a la Heidi Swapp. I just don't know what to put in it!

John called about the jazz tour. Some of the selections are on YouTube. I wonder how to embed a YouTube video in a blog post. So,, I'm going to give it a shot: Here is the Newberry College Jazz Big Band, playing "One Mint Julep."

A better day

2009-02-12T10:59:00.002-05:00

I think today has begun as a better day. I started today with a prayer on the way to school, and that certainly helped put me in a better frame of mind. Now, I just need to make this a habit--along with time in the scriptures as well. How I "envy" those people who can make daily prayer and Bible reading part of my routine. I know it would help as it did in the days after the fire.

I just have to be more positive and more aware of the things that give me "energy"--the energy to teach, to live, to be positive.

Thoughts--and a little sadness

2009-02-11T21:39:00.003-05:00

Golly, what a week. Two days of W(orking)O(n the)W(ork) training; two days out of the classroom. I'm tired. Then, there were two trips to the insurance adjustor's office, checks to sign/endorse, and general business to take care of. The Explorer has been in the shop since Saturday when the clutch went out completed, and the poor baby had to be towed into JD's shop. It spent three days in the shop, two for the clutch, one for the muffler and the front windows.

This afternoon was rather rough. We had an inservice on crisis management plans. Todd Johnson from the sheriff's department spoke to us and showed us some videos of the Columbine shooting in 1999. It was hard to watch. On the one hand, the quality of the video was not great, considering it was the security tapes from the school. Second, the shootings just didn't look like what you see on TV. These two boys were so methodical about what they were doing. There was nothing frantic or frenetic about their actions as you might see on TV or in the movies. Everything was rather calculated and deliberate--and cold-blooded. It was just plain scary.

I don't think I'll put up any photos tonight. I'm too tired to do anything with them before I can upload anything. So, I'm hitting the showers, and going to bed. I'm tired.

The Terrible, Horrible, No-Good Very Bad Day

2009-02-06T14:57:00.002-05:00

I think I want to go to Australia with Alexander today. It has NOT been a good one. First, Aaron says he nearly got into a wreck by driving into the wrong lane. When I talked to him to ask him about the car, he was way too short with me. I think he may lose some driving privileges at the rate he's going.

Then, there's the "mess" with the loan. I am worried, and I probably shouldn't be. I know that Grady said that all of our meetings with LCB have been nothing less than positive, so there's no reason for this one to otherwise. But, the worrier is coming out. . . .

And first block--why should I care whether they want to learn or not? Why should I knock myself out anymore to motivate them when they don't want motivation? All they want is a passing grade without having to do anything to earn that grade. I'm just tired of it all. Maybe it's time to look for a new job. . . .

So, that's the day. I need to have a major attitude adjustment between now and 4:30.

More Practice with My Photography

2009-02-03T20:52:00.003-05:00

I'm still trying to get this photography thing going. I used to be good with a film 35mm SLR camera. I'm not so good with my DSLR. I love my Canon Rebel XTi. But somehow, I'm not getting the best shots, either exposure-wise or composition-wise. I'm not sure what the problem is.

So, I begin to rely on Photoshop Elements to make the improvements I want. That's not so bad. Now, I'm experimenting with Lightroom 2. That made the Photoshop Elements work easier than with Adobe Camera Raw. I think I like Lightroom better. So, here are my latest efforts-well some of them anyway:

I walked yesterday afternoon in the old pasture behind the house I grew up in. I hadn't been back in the woods to the creek in such a long time--since before Grady and I married. From the pasture, I took pictures of the back side of the "playhouse," the outbuilding my father built for a workshop, but which turned into the building where he cooks, processes vegetables, and sometimes just hangs out with his friends. This was built after I moved away from home, not part of my childhood memories of "home." As I made my way down the road through the pasture, I came across the old combine, rusting away in the pasture, no longer of use, no longer useable. But I do remember the hot summers of harvesting the oats in the red field. We had an assortment of farm animals--a small herd of cattle, which we raised for beef; two, three or four hogs, which we butchered in the cold of winter; and the horses. At one time, we had six--and there were only five us in the family, and only four of us rode horses! But, my father and I loved horses. We had to grow the grain to feed the animals.

Even in winter, there is such beauty, a stark beauty. I came across these small red leaves with touches of black. I used my newer 85mm 1.8 lens to photograph these small leaves. I think I'm beginning to understand how to manipulate depth of field. It's taking some doing, though. The 85 mm lens is more difficult to focus than I thought it would be. Eventually, I will get it, though.

Today, my 50mm, 1.8 lens came. I snapped a couple of pictures, just to make sure it worked, nothing that I'm ready to share. Actually, I'll probably just "blast" the test pictures rather than try to print them or edit them.

I have a stack of books about Elements and photography. I need to get busy and read and study and use what I know.

Now, it's off to print a few my pictures.

One Word Project

2009-01-27T16:15:00.002-05:00

Ali Edwards hosts a "one word" project--one word to focus on for the year. I was blog-reading and "rediscovered" Shutter Sisters. I am slowly adding back the blogs that I read regularly before the fire. The Shutter Sisters are also doing a "one word"project. They are choosing a word of the month. Each month, you choose photos that "illustrate" the word. The word for February is "reader's choice." I'm thinking about this. I'm not sure what my word is going to be. Right now, I think it's going to be FAITH.

Faith has sustained me so much during the last three months since the fire. I see faith throughout my life. I have faith that God will take care of me. He says that just as he clothes the birds of the air and flowers of the field, so he will care for me because I am of more value than these. So, how do I start for my photos? The pictures I took last week during the snow day--the berries on the holly show "faith" that spring is coming--slowly, surely,--the evergreen leaves a reminder of life that is always present. Now, I guess tonight I will upload my photos to the Flickr group for the one-word project.

So---February's word is "FAITH."

Progress

2009-01-22T10:26:00.002-05:00

There is much to be hopeful for now. The confirmation pack from Excel is with the builders now. We go tomorrow to confirm the plans and make changes if needed. Then we wait some more for the approval from the state and the permits. Then the foundations can begin and the construction in the factory. I am hopeful for an April move-in.

Class went somewhat better today in first period. At least there were no major disruptions, but the kids simply aren't "learning" to their potential. I gave them a challenge today--to read three chapters and complete a creative assignment about Chloe's character. Now, I need to update the blog for the assignment.

Snow Day!

2009-01-20T21:14:00.004-05:00

We had a snow day. At first we thought we had a two-hour delay, but at 7 a.m., I received the call from the district office that school was cancelled. It was a relaxing day. I did go out a little while with Aaron and took a few pictures of the snow. Daddy's neighbor, Joe Lindler, came over to play with Aaron, and the two rode four-wheelers in the old pasture. I didn't go out for long; it was just too cold my blood. But, it was nice having a "free" day, a gift to relax, to have no deadlines, no pressures, no commitments.

Scrap Camp

2009-01-13T21:30:00.002-05:00

In a month, I will be going to Scrap Camp at Lutheridge. I am looking forward to that weekend--a retreat to take care of myself for a little while. I emailed Liz yesterday, and I am going to teach a class! I'm going to teach a class on my "Book of Days". Now, I need to get my list of materials and instructions toegher to send to Liz.

I also need to get some pictures of my Book of Days to post here. And I need to learn how to upload documents so that folks at Scrap Camp can download the calendar templates for the book. Now, I wonder how I want to teach the binding techniques--do I want to teach the stitched book, or the "grade book" from the craft tv video, or the kind of book I made with the bind-it-all. So many decisions!

Word of the Year

2009-01-05T11:11:00.002-05:00

Ali Edwards has a "word of/for the year" challenge. This year, I'm at a loss for one word, but I "think" it's going to be "NEW BEGINNINGS." This will be a year of new beginnings, especially with the new house coming very soon. It will be a time of starting over, beginning fresh, making a "new life." It's scary, and it's exciting, and it's nerve-wracking. It's going to be a challenge.

Mobile Blogging

2009-01-02T17:19:00.001-05:00

So, what else can I do with my BlackBerry besides make calls, send and receive text messages and emails, and surf the 'Net? I can blog!!!!! This is so cool! So, I took this picture of the computer and sent it to my blog. What else can I do with my phone? This is the coolest "toy" I've had yet!

Auld Lange Syne

2008-12-31T23:09:00.002-05:00

It's after 11, and I'm not far from the bed. I don't think I'm going to watch the ball drop tonight. This year has ended in "fireworks" for sure, though not the kind I want. I suppose we'll be celebrating in a new house next year this time, but the process of getting it is something else. I don't ever want to go through this experience again.

I just read on Ali Edwards' blog that she is starting the One Word Challenge for 2009 again. I don't know what my word will be this year. Faith is certainly a strong part of this whole rebuilding experience, as is trust. I am having to trust that God will take care of us throughout the year and will provide everything we need, including peace of mind. Perhaps "peace" is another good choice for a word for the year. This will be something to think about for awhile.

The neighbors are shooting fireworks, and they sound really close. We aren't doing fireworks tonight (thank goodness). I don't think I really want them, but I would imagine that John will bring some home.

So, it's near the end of the evening, the end of the year. It's time to make some new beginnings, fresh starts, and everything will be okay.

After Christmas

2008-12-28T21:57:00.002-05:00

I am glad that the Christmas "festivities" are over. I'm ready for a break, for sure. We are making progress on the house. We have a builder and a floor plan. We have a lot of decisions to make still, such as furnishings, decorating, and the like. I am looking forward to the fresh start. I just hope we can keep it "fresh."

I am tired. We've been so busy. I want to begin to scrapbook again, but I don't have the tools or the supplies. I've signed up for the scrap camp at Lutheridge at the end of February, and I am looking forward to that. Maybe I'll have something I can scrapbook at that time. I bought some things today--a mini-album, some Bohemia papers, adhesives, and a few embellishments. I have three scrapbook kits as well. I'm ready to do something. I just have to find my inspiration. Maybe if I get back to the blogs and the magazines, I can find the means to do something again.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-29T20:15:00.002-05:00

What a month! so much as happened, and I have not updated my blog since September. October was filled with marching band activities--competitions every weekend, culminating with state at the end of October.

Then November came in. In some ways it seems like yesterday; in other ways, this has been the longest month. On November 3, we lost our home to fire. We've been working every day getting ready for the final demolition, and it will be here on Monday, Dec. 1. I don't know what we will do next, whether we will build from the ground up, or whether we will opt for modular construction. We just have to weigh our options.

I do know that we have a great deal for which to be thankful. Mama and Daddy have graciously offered us a roof over our heads for as long as we need it. Our church has supported us with generous gifts. Moreover, area churches have also provided support--donations, benefit suppers, and special offerings. There's a lot going one.

The next step is to decide what to do next. Grady and I need some time to sit down and talk about our plans and to make decisions without anyone else around. I have two plans to think about. We just need to decide.

So, we begin again--start over. We will make it.

It's autumn, I think.

2008-09-29T19:59:00.002-05:00

Well, the weather is cooling off in the evenings; there's Friday night football. The tomatoes are starting to die off--signs of fall.

Marching band competitions began for us Saturday. One of the bands used Les Miserables as their theme. I listened to the soundtrack again tonight. I love that music. Of course, there's not much that I don't like.

The Wednesday Letters

2008-09-24T21:34:00.002-05:00

I just finished Jason F. Wright's The Wednesday Letters. It is a beautiful story of love, tragedy, forgiveness, and redemption. I started it last night and read until 11:30--too late for me! and I finished it tonight. I caught myself crying throughout the book--from the beginning when Jack and Laurel die in each other's arms--one from a heart attack, the other from terminal cancer, to Malcolm's sending his son off to college (how I can relate to that!).

I haven't done a lot of reading in a long time, but I seem to have gotten "turned on" to the books again. I'm halfway through The Last Lecture--another uplifting book. I've started Left to Tell, about one young woman's survival during the Rwandan genocide. Waiting on the side is The Shack, which Dorothy highly recommends. There are other books I have to read as well. Maybe I can get on a roll again.

I like the idea of the Wednesday letters. I'm not sure I'd have the dedication to keep up the habit, though.

So, it's time for bed.

Adios, August

2008-08-31T20:10:00.003-05:00

It's the last day of August. Tomorrow is Labor Day, and a holiday from school. Boy, do I need it! I'm in a sling, supposed to be anyway, but I'm not wearing it tonight so that I work on the computer. I have bicep tendonitis, and it hurts! Actually, I'm feeling better now than I have in weeks. My arm is a little sore, but it's not the constant pain that I've had for several weeks. I just have to remember to take it easy.

It was football weekend. Grady went with the band Friday night to Whitmire for the game there. We went to Newberry College yesterday for that game. Of course, we weren't really going to watch to the game so much as we were going to see John march and Aaron march. I did enjoy the game at the college. It's been a LONG time since I have been to an NC game. Of course, now, I have to get used to the Indians not being the Indians anymore. They lost the appeal to keep the mascot. Yesterday, the announcer kept calling the team the Scarlet and Gray. I really don't know how I feel about changing the mascot, and I don't know what the new mascot should be.

Tomorrow, Aaron is having a cookout with his friends. Oh, brother, and oh bother! I have to get him to study first.

Recovering

2008-08-28T05:15:00.002-05:00

I think we are recovering. Grady is active; he's taking vacation time today and tomorrow with the Labor Day weekend. Aaron is able to move his thumb after the dog bite. There does not seem to be any infection. I am regaining my equilibrium after massive classes and total shakeup of schedules at school.

I'm looking forward to this long weekend.

Rest--maybe some time out with the camera. We will see.

Puppy Love And Chick Magnets

2008-08-24T15:36:00.004-05:00

Okay, we have a yard full of puppies, three weeks old or so. Aaron's dog Queen (possibly the UGLIEST dog I've ever seen) and John's dog Pup are the proud parents. It's a good thing puppies are cute!

And Aaron always comes with the something to say: "Mom, something happened to me this summer. I'm a chick magnet!"

Remnants of the Cold War

2008-08-23T20:10:00.003-05:00

Grady and John were taking down an old cinder block well house at the local community center. Inside the well house were two barrels for storing water or for sanitation purposes, some remnants of the Cold War. I wonder how many more of these reminders there are hidden away in shelters, out buildings, storage sheds. . . .

First Week of School

2008-08-21T19:51:00.002-05:00

And what a week it has been! My content recovery classes are overcrowded. Now, I'm about to lose one of my ESOL classes so that they can create another content recovery section. I will survive. I'm still the "lead" ESOL teacher, but I won't be teaching as much. We'll really have to a lot of coordinating.

The trauma of euthanizing Ash is about to wear off. That was a difficult decision in many ways. I know it was for the best. When I told her that we had to let her go, she seemed to nod her head. I think she knew it was for the best. John and Grady buried her and made a neat grave over her with stones from the woods. I think she's happy.

Aaron's hand is healing. From the uncertainty of Sunday, wondering whether he would need surgery or a cast or something, to knowing that he will heal and the soreness and stiffness are mostly due to the bite wounds--it's a lot to take in the first week. Now, I have JURY DUTY on Monday. I just need to remember to call them tomorrow! I keep forgetting.

Now, it's off to the races. Time to get some work done.

Rest in peace, Ash

2008-08-17T16:33:00.003-05:00

Last night, we had to put Ash to sleep. She had been run over by a car, and the injuries were just too severe--seriously abraded skin, broken bones, and critical spinal column injuries. I went in to her, petted her ear, told her we loved her, and said good-bye. Then I brought her home to be buried.

Good-bye, Ash. Happy hunting in heaven.

Bob the Builder

2008-08-16T17:36:00.003-05:00

When my children were preschoolers, there was no Bob the Builder, but Aaron is taking his place. When he asked me to get him a desk for his room so he would have a place to study, I definitely agreed! After last year's academic issues, I did not want him to lose his desire to do better this year. So, he is in his room assembling his desk as I type. I did manage to get a few pictures of the process.

Now, I just have to prepare myself for next week--the students return. . . .

Finally. . . .

2008-08-06T14:01:00.002-05:00

We have had computer woes. Monday night, the Internet connection was lost. I reset modems and routers, fiddled with this wire, monkeyed with that one. I called the tech support for my internet provider. He checked the line, had ATT check the line. . . . Nothing. I called back this morning, and we determined that it was the modem. If I waited for the technician to come, it would be tomorrow. So, I went to Columbia to get it and install it myself. Well, I worked for 2.5 hours, but I finally got reconnected. I am exhausted. You wouldn't think so because I stayed pretty much in one place, but I was up and down, pulling out this wire, organizing that one. I am tired. Now, I still need to fix some supper. But at least I'm connected.

I wonder why I can do without the Internet when I know I won't have it, but when I can have it, and don't, I get antsy? Maybe I'm just too connected to this technology.

Updates

2008-08-04T19:19:00.002-05:00

It's the last week before school starts for me. Aaron will have another week after that. I start on the 11th; he starts on the 18th. John will be moving back into Newberry College next week. Band camp is under way. They are learning the new show, Exultate.

Aaron is excited. Queen had her puppies sometime in the last 24 hours. She delivered 12, but six were either still born or died shortly after birth. The surviving puppies are very active and larger than I expected. Pictures will come later, in the next day or two.

Aaron gets the stitches out tomorrow. His gash is healing pretty well. His buddy Ryan has a fracture in his right arm after he jumped out of the moving pickup so that he could walk back with Seth. What is it about teenage boys and accidents?

Aaron and I went to the Little Mountain Reunion Saturday. He marched in the parade with the band. I watched from my usual post in front of the Suhr's house.

Today, I worked on my technique cards. I did get three completed. I'm going to work on some more tomorrow, I think. But I won't have as much time since I'm taking Aaron to the doctor. I guess it will have to wait until Wednesday.

The Countdown

2008-08-01T21:33:00.002-05:00

Eleven days until school starts for me. Inservice on the 11-15, and students come on the 18th. Band camp started today for Aaron, and tomorrow is the Little Mountain Reunion parade. I'll be going by myself, I suppose, as both Grady and John are working in the morning. It won't be bad. I'll take up my post at the Suhr's parsonage, as I usually do, and watch from there. I'm charging the camera batteries now.

It's been a very quiet day here. I got in a short nap this afternoon. I fixed a decent supper--pork roast, butter beans, and mac and cheese. All in all, it was a good day.

My morning run was really good. I made 40 consecutive minutes, and I didn't wear the knee braces today. My knees don't hurt, either! Not like they have done earlier. I suppose all that Aleve is paying off to some extent.

I'm reading Douglas Preston's book, The Monster of Florence. It's creepy. Really strange book. But then most of the books I've read by Preston and Childs have a creepy element to them. I just wonder if the killer will ever be identified or caught. It doesn't seem like it.

So, for two weeks I haven't done anything with the technique cards. I really need to make time to do that. I really don't want to until we get the computer moved, but I'm not sure that's going to happen. It will have to happen next week if it's going to happen.

Thursday reading

2008-07-31T20:30:00.002-05:00

It's been a busy day. First, I had a class at MidCarolina Middle School about the updates to the teacher evaluation program. Apparently, the district is desperate for evaluators. I asked to be taken off the list, but found myself on it again. Sigh. . . .

Then it was a trip to the orthodontist in Irmo, a trip to two guitar stores, A. C. Moore, and Sportsman's Warehouse. Then on the way home, we went to the library to pick up my new book, The Monster of Florence by Douglas Preston. It's as good as I expected, given the author! I devoured the Pendergast series. I'm ready for another one. And last, we went to the grocery store, only to the car break down. Just we needed--another vehicle in the shop! The Ranger is in the shop now; I really don't want the Taurus to have to go there as well. It's not a good situation.

Tomorrow, I have to get back on the creating path again as well as getting the computer ready to move. John is working in the field in the morning, and helping with the band camp in the afternoon. Aaron will be gone all day. So, that's the plan for the day.

No pictures today again. I'll have to get back in the habit of taking pictures.

We are having a threat of rain. We desperately need it.

Wednesday

2008-07-30T16:40:00.003-05:00

I've had another blue day--more because I didn't rest last night. That right upper arm and shoulder really hurt all night long, and I couldn't get comfortable. I did go for my run this morning, and I went to the high school to register Aaron for school. He has a pretty good schedule, repeating Spanish I and doing content recovery for Physical Science. Everything else is on track for tenth grade. He's going to have some good teachers.

We are making progress with the next phase of cleaning. I've got the computer desk almost ready to move into the "office". John is going to take the bed apart and sleep on the floor until school starts in two weeks.

I think we're going to go hiking on August 10. We'll miss church, but that's okay. We'll be worshipping, but not in a traditional way.

So, that's the day. I need to get in the kitchen to get supper ready. I'm not inspired.

Tuesday Blues

2008-07-29T19:10:00.002-05:00

Okay, it should have been a good day. I got out "early" for my morning "constitutional"--I made a 28 minute run ( I was hoping for 30). I got back in time to pick up Ryan so the boys could pick beans at Leon's. John helped at band camp today until 12. Aaron cleaned up his room. I started working on the computer desk so we can move it into the "office." Then why am I feeling blue? Who knows? Maybe it's just the phase of the moon. Who knows? I just am.

School will be starting for me in two weeks. I don't feel ready, even though I have my schedule for the year. I have a feeling it's going to change or be modified in some way. My new English Journal came today, and for the first time in months, I actually sat down to read it. It's about a subject that I'm interested in--teaching and doing the "right thing" as a professional and teacher and human. There are some articles about teaching for social justice, and that's something I'm really interested in. I like the idea of critical literacy and helping students learn to read both the word and the world. I want students to be citizens of the world, not just their same little places they call home. I get to see another side of students by teaching ELLs because they see our American society in different ways. They make me uncomfortable in some respects because I have to see how privileged I truly am--as an American, white female. I have to keep thinking about how to get the students involved in the deeper thinking and reading that they truly need to do.

No photos today. I just don't feel like working on any or selecting any. I want to find time to be creative, but I don't know when. I have a week's worth of cards to catch up on, plus the two for this week. I don't know when I'll work on them, but I know I need to be creative again.

So, tomorrow I hope will be a better day.

Monday, Monday

2008-07-28T21:13:00.002-05:00

It's Monday. I went for my run this morning--40 minutes today. Of course, I had to do it in two "sprints"--one 25 minute run and one 15 minute run. It felt pretty good. My knees are holding up pretty well.

Aaron had another accident today--he fell in the bathroom and ended up with five stitches in his forehead. It's a good thing that the cut is at the eye brow. Any scaring won't be that noticeable. John is finally making progress in his bedroom. He moved some furniture around and put the dresser and blanket chest in the closet. He wants to take his bed apart next. I'm not sure about that, but it will give us an office and scrap room. I think I want some kind of table to put in the middle of the room, perhaps to work on. We will see.

I worked on editing some pictures today, and I think they will turn out pretty well. I'm almost tempted to check into ordering prints on line rather than printing them out myself. I think I can send them to Walmart and then pick them up at the store later. I'll need to check that out.

Sunday Afternoon Drives

2008-07-27T20:28:00.003-05:00

In the "old days," we used to get in the car and go for a ride--just to see the sites, no destination, just to ride. Often the rides ended up in someone's yard for a visit. Today, we took out the boat and went for a ride--up the Saluda River. Once we got out of the lake into the river, the scenery changed. Some of my pictures are blurry. I haven't mastered the art of taking pictures while the boat is moving. I suppose I should have set it on shutter priority so that I could have faster speeds. But I did get a few good ones. I took almost 600 pictures! I've never taken that many in one day in my life! Of course, I never had a really fast digital camera before either. I shot the boys while they wake boarded and skiied on sports setting. I have so many pictures, I can't decide which ones to work on.

Some of the sights:
John wakeboarding

A grove of cypress trees

Flowers

Two Weeks

2008-07-26T18:43:00.004-05:00

I have two weeks of summer vacation left! Where did June and July go? August 11 will be here before much longer.

Aaron is back from Camp Old Indian, and he is in really good spirits! I am surprised! Usually, he's cranky and grumpy, but today, he is in a good mood. Now, he did sleep for three hours this afternoon!

John and I are making progress in his bedroom closet. He's not thrilled that I'm keeping some of my crafty stuff in his closet, but he'll get over it.

I did not do well last week in Weight Watchers. I gained almost a pound and a half. But I'm not too worried. I'll just do better this coming week. I do have to remember that I have an inservice to go to on Thursday, July 31, for ADEPT training. Yuck.

Now, I need to get busy with the professional reading I should have done all summer. I just have not been in the mood to read much of anything, not even for pleasure. But that's okay. Maybe I will be in a better frame of mind when I go back in August. Maybe I won't be feeling quite so "burnt out" or tired or unenthusiastic.

I really want to go hiking soon. But it's hot, and it's almost the end of the summer, and I doubt it will happen.

Friday Challenges

2008-07-25T16:19:00.002-05:00

It seems sometimes that Fridays are challenges. It's the end of a week of work, the supposed beginning of "fun days." Yet sometimes, Fridays are just hanging. Today was one of those hanging days. I went for my run this morning--not as far as I ran Wednesday, but still I did about 30 minutes of running out of the hour I was out. I prepared lunch for John and me. Now, I have to think about supper. I'm not inspired. I want to do something "creative," but right now, I have several garbage bags hanging out in my living area and I certainly do not want to add to that mess! I cleaned out John's closet. There are so many baby clothes in there. I really should have done this sooner. Well, maybe we can get the work done by the end of next week.

I'm still learning some editing skills in Photoshop. I edited a couple more of the pictures of Poinsett Bridge today. I like the effect of the "old photo" look--these made into a sepia print rather than a black and white or the old photo filter.

So here are my latest attempts:

Busy Week, and the End of the Summer

2008-07-24T20:33:00.002-05:00

It's almost over--the summer, that is. Aaron is at Camp Old Indian. Rookie band camp starts Monday; the Little Mountain Reunion parade is next Saturday. I start school on August 11, and Aaron starts school on August 18.

I went to a ESOL workshop on Monday. I met an interesting woman from Greenville County--Eve Diaz. She gave me a contact for the lead ESOL teacher for her district. That will certainly help me when I decide to start planning for the new school year. Yesterday, we went back to Camp Old Indian for visitor's day. Aaron was in exceptionally good spirits--no whining!!!! That's hard to imagine, really, because every year that Aaron has gone to camp, he has had something to whine about when we visit on Wednesday.

We made an interesting "side trip" yesterday to the Poinsett Bridge. I don't know much of the history of that place. It was late, and the light was not great for hand-held picture taking--and of course, my big tripd was at home. I did get some sort of decent pictures. I played with some of the Photoshop features today as I edited them. One of them came out really well--I turned it into an "old photo" with the actions that come with PSE 6. I know they aren't called actions, but I don't know of another name to give them. Using the old photo effect hid some of the "errors"-the blurriness of the pictures. I still have some more to edit. I don't know what I'll do with the pictures. I'll have to think about it.

Here is one of my pictures:

Summer Goodness

2008-07-20T06:24:00.002-05:00

Thank goodness for summer homegrown tomatoes.

Soar

2008-07-15T12:13:00.002-05:00

This morning, I walked around the pond. I just didn't feel like walking at all, but I knew that if I didn't walk, then I probably would find an excuse for not walking tomorrow as well. Staying up past midnight does take its toll on me. I'm definitely not as young as I used to be. As I finished up the walk around the big pond, I heard a splash. When I looked, I saw an osprey rise from the pond. It had been "fishing." I watched it for a few minutes as it soared above the pond. It is another reminder that I need to look up. While I may not be able to soar physically, the osprey is a reminder that I can soar in other ways.

Organization

2008-07-06T12:08:00.002-05:00

It's taking a LONG time to get organized around here. I hate organizing! I end up getting more confused. But I am discovering "treasures" that I had forgotten I had! Maybe one day, I will be able to create again. I know where my art journal is now. I want to work on that again soon. I need to take time to create. Maybe one day I will get some pictures of my organization together!

Hotel Rwanda

2008-06-24T19:37:00.002-05:00

I know I'm behind in movies! Hotel Rwanda has been out for awhile, but I'm just now getting around to watching it on DVD. John and I watched it this afternoon at lunchtime. My goodness, what a powerful movie! The main character, Paul, is a hero who did not set out to be a hero. I can only imagine the courage that it must have taken to rescue the 1200+ Rwandans from certain death. I don't know that I could have that kind of courage. How easy it would have been to lock the hotel doors against the "enemy."

I think what strikes me so about the instances of genocide that I know about is the fact that the objects of the genocide truly look no different from the perpetrators! How could anyone tell the difference between a Hutu and a Tutsi? The same question can be asked of the Holocaust: how can you tell the difference between a German/European gentile and a European Jew? What can possibly breed such hatred for humanity that genocide occurs? I suppose these are questions that no one will ever be able to answer.

Hotel Rwanda is not a movie that you can "enjoy" in the pleasure sense of the word. It is a movie that will make you uncomfortable, especially when you know that most of the Western nations knew about the genocide but chose to ignore it. How can any one nation, though, take care of the world and itself at the same time? This is a must-see movie, however, a movie that we need to watch, need to take in, so that we can continue the "message" of the Holocaust--"never forget." It is when we forget that we allow genocide to happen. Perhaps we cannot eliminate genocide, but we can certain make sure that the casualties are limited.

Sunday morning

2008-06-22T10:05:00.005-05:00

I've been stalking the ospreys this weekend. They are on the nest now. I think some of the fledglings might be leaving the nest. I keep looking at the these birds as reminders that my faith comes from above. I am reminded of the scriptures from Isaiah and Psalm 91.

He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. Psalm 91

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40: 31.

The Artist's Way

2008-06-17T10:15:00.002-05:00

I'm into week two of the The Artist's Way course. I like what I'm reading. It's spiritual enough that I can keep my faith, not that I was in danger of losing it, but still. . . . It's open enough that I can embrace a lot of ideas. One of the things that strikes me is that Julia Cameron talks about how creativity comes from God and how being creative honors God. God is the spirit of creativity. I know the Genesis story; God is the creator of all life.

I scribbled my notes in my book today because I left my journal at home. There are a couple of things I really need to work on. I set two small goals for myself: one of them is to start a photo a day project. This is something I've wanted to do for awhile, but never quite made myself do it. I'll have to make myself do it.

I also noticed one thing the book pointed out: it's easier just to get started and do something rather than to sit and "plan" to do something. Once I started cleaning and uncluttering the living area, it became easier. The hard part was just getting started. I've lost a little momentum, but I think if I start again, I will recover it. This is what I need to do.

Movies and Baseball

2008-06-15T20:31:00.002-05:00

Since we've been out of school, John and I have had a couple of "movie nights" when we weren't watching Braves baseball games. We've watched a couple of the Harry Potter movies and The Great Debaters. I bought the Indiana Jones movies, the first three, Friday. We haven't had a movie night to watch those yet. I want to see the new Indiana Jones movie, but I imagine that I will wait until it's out on DVD. I want to watch The Da Vinci Code again, and a couple of others. I have Atonement, but I haven't watched it. I also haven't seen The Aviator yet either,nor have I watched Hotel Rwanda.

I know that movies that I've been watching aren't that "deep." That's okay. Sometimes, we just need to sit back and enjoy movies for the entertainment value alone. Now, Hotel Rwanda will probably be a bit deeper than the other movies. We'll have to see.

Spring Cleaning

2008-06-14T22:26:00.002-05:00

Well, we bit the bullet, and we have been spring cleaning. I mean DEEP spring cleaning. I've almost got half the living room done this week; I rearranged the furniture today (my aching back!), and have thrown out a LOT of junk. We have taken three boxes of books to the Chapin library for Friends of the Library. We've hauled off quite a few bags of trash. I have a good bit to do yet, but the task is getting smaller. I told Grady that we have to clear the forest in order to see the trees. If we can get the big stuff out of the way, then I can deal with the smaller things.

I do feel some relief at getting the worst of the clutter out of the way. It's nice to walk on a cleaner floor, too. The main thing is just to get things organized, something I'm not good at. But it's okay. I can "learn," I think.

I like the way we're putting the shelves up. I just have to be careful not to overload them.I'm going to rearrange some of the pictures we've got up, and we'll get most of this done this summer. I don't know that I'm going to tackle my bedroom this summer, but my main goal is to get the living area back to a living area.

Now, I need to read until John gets home. I want to finish watching the Braves game. Right now, the Braves are winning--eighth inning, Braves ahead 7-3.

Tomorrow, I will start processing my thinking toward the National Board Certification on my NBC blog.

Two very long days

2008-05-28T20:58:00.002-05:00

I've been in the classroom for 28 years, and during the last two days, I've done something that I have never done--I went through the process of taking a child through a report of abuse. Yesterday, my student wanted me to go with her to the counselor because she was having problems with her family, particularly her father, who has been drinking and beating her. We went to guidance; the counselor called the school's safety officer and DSS. After interviews with the police and DSS, it was determined that no one would do anything except "investigate." The student did not want anyone to talk to her father because she knew that she would have trouble at home. And she did: her father beat her again, this time with a printer cable. Tonight, she is in foster care somewhere. Why does it take a severe beating to get someone to do something? I hope that she was not ignored because she is Hispanic. I am frustrated by the system, and I have absolutely no faith in the system to take care of children. I hope that good will come out of this, but I don't know or what right now. I am just relieved that she will be safe tonight.

Becoming More

2008-05-15T19:09:00.003-05:00

I'm "taking" Kolette Hall's "The Art of Becoming More" scrapbooking class. I've made my notebook, and I've done some of the worksheets. I haven't made my layouts yet. Maybe I can do them this weekend. However, the first week's principle of deciding what is of value, and setting goals based on what I value led me to take the big step of applying for National Board Certification in English as a New Language instead of renewing my English language arts certificate. I would have to do one or the other, and I decided that I would pursue the new certificate. It will certainly force me to do more in planning and thinking about the ESOL classes than I am doing now. It's going to an interesting journey this summer and this school year.

Name Change and Artful Blogs

2008-05-13T13:46:00.003-05:00

I didn't like the name of my blog, so I changed it. I may change it again.

I am reading the new summer edition of Artful Blogging, and I love it. So beautiful--inspiring. If only mine were so artful; if only I had the time to be so artful. Maybe during the summer, I can get back to creating and becoming artful.

Mother's Day

2008-05-12T21:22:00.002-05:00

It's Monday. Yesterday was Mother's Day. Like always, we went to church. For the first time since I've been going to Macedonia, Pastor did not give a eulogy to his mother. After church, we went to Elaine's. Everyone was there--Mama, Daddy, James, Kim, Georgia, Elaine, David, and the four of us. We had a truly great lunch. We all contributed--I made brown rice and a salad. Elaine had a ham; James smoked some chicken and Kim made the macaroni and cheese. Elaine made strawberry ice cream and pound cake for dessert. So good this time of year. . . .

Aaron gave me a coupon book for Mother's Day! I can't remember the expiration date! But I get a two-day pass from cooking supper, a two-day pass from washing dishes, and a two-day pass from laundry! He even put in an expiration date! Hee, hee. . . .

I'm really working on my photography when I can. I want to do more, to push my skills. I love this whole idea of being a creative person. I just don't know where it's leading me right now. I haven't put my heart and soul into teaching this year. Perhaps it's the distractions of Grady's illness that have kept me from working harder at it. I don't know. We'll have to see.

So, no pictures to post; nothing but rambling. I wish I could write posts like Amy Sorenson. I love "The English Geek" blog!

Creating Art

2008-04-25T22:10:00.003-05:00

On the way to school, I pass a church that has a sign near the road. This week, the sign is about wishing wells and living wells, referring to the gospel in which Jesus declares that he is the living water. Tonight, I pulled out my art journal and my PrismaColor nupastels and drew for the first time in a long time! And this is the result:

And another development: Aaron has his beginner's permit. He is driving. We had our first driving lesson today. I let him drive to the church and back, and later, he drove to Chapin to pick up our supper from Pizza Hut. I'm not sure when I'll lose the temptation to dig my fingernails in the armrest of the car. I have designated the official "driving teacher" of the family. I taught John; I'm teaching Aaron. It's going to be an interesting six months.

Now, it's getting late, and I have to get up early for a Saturday morning. Aaron is working for Leon, and I have to run the taxi to pick up Wil and Seth to help.

Right now, I wish I could wish in a wishing well and get my "heart's desire."

Graduation

2008-04-18T20:24:00.002-05:00

It's a month away! Two of my students dropped by today wearing their newly arrived caps and gowns. Vic was taking pictures, and I had my camera as well. He took pictures of Jamar and Justin and me. Jamar says I'm his favorite English teacher! I need to print the pictures and give the pictures to the boys, and I need to send one to Jackie.

Retreat

2008-04-16T05:30:00.002-05:00

It's Wednesday. I feel like I'm still on the mountain at Lutheridge, not quite back in the real world, still in a "place apart." Yet reality is creeping in! HSAP testing starts next week. I'm only a hall monitor this year! Yea!

I didn't really accomplish much scrapping while at Lutheridge, but it's okay. AT this point, I wanted the break and the retreat, a way to step away from reality for a little while. And I accomplished that. But now, I have to focus on the real.

And I get frustrated at the bloggers who don't up date their own blogs!

2008-04-05T13:20:00.002-05:00

Here it is April 5, and I haven't done anything with my blog since March 29! If I'm going to fuss at others, even inside my head, then I better start practicing what I'm preaching!

I'm trying to get some cleaning done, and it's hard. Aaron is at the grandparents' for awhile, and he wants me to come get him NOW. I want to get a little more done, but I'm not motivated. I HATE CLEANING HOUSE! But, if I'm going to go away for the weekend next weekend, then I need things in order. I also need to start planning what I'm going to take with me to Lutheridge in terms of the scrapbooking stuff. The clothes will be the easy part. I need to find my paperwork and put everything together. I am excited.

Now, back to work.

Art Journal

2008-03-29T18:59:00.003-05:00

I started my art journal today, and I've completed three entries. I'm following the prompts in Emily Falconbridge's blog. Each week, she provides a word as a prompt for the journal entry that week. So far, I've done one for commit, begin, and balance. I have to catch up to this week's entry--twelve in all. I feel good about it. . . . It's different--so far, no pictures, just words and images. I've used the distress ink to create the backgrounds of the pages. I've used florals, brads, stamps, pen-and-ink to write words. On the back of each journal entry, I write about the word, what it means to me, why I'm using that word at that time. For now, I'm not doing the words in Emily's order. I don't think she will mind! It's an interesting experience. I need to read my books about creativity and art journals. I do want to stretch myself. This is something I can do while I"m at Lutheridge as well! Shoot--I have to plan my things for that trip as well!

Spring Cleaning

2008-03-25T19:19:00.004-05:00

It may be spring break time for us, but it's spring cleaning time as well. Today the kitchen and entryway as well as the two bathrooms got a good mopping! Tomorrow the carpet gets cleaned, I think. . . . . I still need to de-clutter, but I'm too tired to think about that tonight. I'll just plan on getting the floors vacuumed and the furniture dusted. I think I'll be ready to go back to school next week so I can rest! Tonight, I play with the scrapbooking again. . . . It's spring break!

He is risen!

2008-03-23T21:23:00.003-05:00

Easter, March 23, 2008

Spring Break

2008-03-21T09:25:00.000-05:00

It's almost here. I can't wait. I need rest.

Reconnecting

2008-03-12T20:13:00.002-05:00

Tonight, I am reconnecting with music. I just finished watching "Celtic Thunder" for the second time, and now I'm listening to Sarah Brightman. It's PBS fundraising time, but that's okay. Something's been missing the last couple of weeks, something I really can't define, but the music is helping to put me back to rights. I do need to reconnect with the music again, both as a listener and as a performer. There are times my fingers want to feel the solidness of the piano keys even though I know the sounds I will be make if I do play amount to no more than "joyful noise." But it's a way to begin. Also, I got to hold Michelle's baby today--only about six or seven weeks old, four weeks premature. Isaac is a precious little thing. I haven't really help a baby in almost fifteen years! It was nice, but the good thing about other people's babies is that you can always give them back.

So, I'm doing some connecting, some reconnecting, and some reflecting.

More TV

2008-03-10T20:41:00.002-05:00

It's not every day that I get "control" over the TV! But tonight is one of those nights. First, I watched the last hour of James Taylor on the local PBS station. Now, I'm watching Sarah Brightman. All I can say is, "Wow!"

I cooked tonight--really, I did! I put a pork roast in the crockpot last night. It was good and done when I got home. I steamed some vegetables to go with it. Now, I'm working on trying to cooking more this week.

I'm working on the photography with my new camera. I'm beginning to understand the idea of depth of field. I really need to keep practicing. What I'd love to do is take a photography class with someone who would critique my pictures. I think it's the photography that I love most as artistic expression, although creating the scrapbooks and the mini-books also helps to convey the "message" through the art.

Welcome Spring

2008-03-09T11:44:00.004-05:00

The cherry tree in the back yard is blooming-a sure sign that spring is not far away. I am ready.

Celtic Thunder

2008-03-05T22:13:00.002-05:00

So, it's Wednesday night. John is at Newberry (where he's supposed to be!), Aaron is in bed, and so is Grady. I'm up alone--watching ETV and Celtic Thunder! Oh, my goodness! Five good-looking and better sounding Celtic men, singing wonderful songs from tradition to popular! One of them just finished one of my all-time favorite Eagles' songs: "Desperado". I absolutely love it. I just had to download the music from Zune tonight. Wow! Now, I'm trying a "trick." I"m going to try to put in the YouTube video of Celtic Thunder, but YouTube is doing maintenance--during prime time! This may have to wait!

And now, the flu

2008-03-01T21:06:00.002-05:00

Well, it was bound to happen one day. Aaron has the flu--a full-blown case of it, according to Dr. Carroll. He's taking the Tamiflu capsules for it, and tylenol and advil for fever, aches, and pains. I gave him a Mucinex tablet for the congestion and cough. It's going to be a long weekend. So far, he hasn't had constant fever, but he has had some.

I went for a walk today, and actually ran for about 13 minutes, not continuously, but in three stretches. My knee isn't hurting tonight, but I can tell I've used some muscles that haven't been used in awhile. Hopefully, I'll make some progress toward my weight loss goals this week. I haven't done well this month; it's been stressful. But hopefully, I can turn things around for the next month or so.

TGIF and long weekends

2008-02-23T22:28:00.004-05:00

This has been a short week at school. We had Monday off as a holiday for Presidents' Day, and Friday off for professional development. I took Aaron to Sylvan Learning Center for evaluation. He's struggling in school; homework results in "knock-down-drag-out" fights almost every night, and no one is happy by the end of the evening. I'm too tired to deal with all of this by myself. So, I took the drastic measure of having him tested and enrolling him in Sylvan for help.

The good news of the weekend, though, is Aaron's success at archery. Coach Harris offered him a spot on the archery team, but the rascal didn't pay attention and he missed the forma tryouts. He does get to practice with the team, however, and next year, he's pretty much assured of a spot (if he will remember to the tryouts!). So, yesterday, we bought his bow. Today, he spent most of the morning outside shooting at his target.

And spring is almost here. Grandma's camellia bush is blooming. I brought some of the blooms in last week, but this week, there are a lot more buds open. When I went out to look and take pictures, I saw the raindrops still on the petals and leaves. Another reminder that though she is physically gone, Grandma is still very much a part of us.

A Little Bit of Spring

2008-02-17T17:45:00.003-05:00

Signs of spring today--the camellia bush is blooming, and daffodils are starting to bloom as well. It won't be long before it's spring.

Saying Goodbye

2008-02-10T07:56:00.000-05:00

I remember the day that Grandma died. I was at the beach on the Isle of Palms. As usual, I was the first one up, and I went for a run on the beach. I headed up the beach enjoying the solitude of the empty beach. As I came back down, I looked toward the pier and thought about extending the run to the pier, but something told me to go back to the house. The closer I came to the "exit" point that would take me to the street, the stronger the feeling became.

Pat was up as well, reading the newspaper. He told me that I needed to call home. Mama told me that Grandma had passed away that morning, very quietly, so quietly in fact, that the technician who came in to do an EKG put two of the sensors on her before realizing that Grandma had slipped quietly away.

Grady, John, and I packed and came home that day. We ate supper with Mama and Daddy. The next day, we would have the visitation at the funeral home, and the funeral would be on Sunday. The visitation was not hard at first, but as the viewing room emptied, the emotions built. I stayed behind; I wanted to say goodbye by myself. I knew I would fall apart if I went to the coffin. I didn't want that to happen.

That was three years ago. Yesterday, Uncle Lee had us come over to get things from Grandma's bedroom. It was time. My cousins and I were together--all but two, Virginia and Franklin. The great-grandchildren weren't all there, but Caroline, Georgia, and Jason's two boys were there. There was not the sadness that I thought would be there. We exchanged memories about who gave Grandma what gifts, when she might have worn a pair of gloves, or what we remembered about the things we looked through. We looked for special things--pieces of tatting for me; jewelry; quilts; pictures. . . . I came home with several pieces of jewelry, including a cameo brooch, a string of pearls, and some other costume jewelry; a sampler that I gave Grandma and Granddaddy for their 50th wedding anniversary and "housewarming" for the new house; a print of Jerusalem Lutheran Church, where Grandma went when she lived in Georgia. . . . I felt that I was bringing Grandma, or at least a piece of her, home with me.

We all did say goodbye yesterday--Janet, Jason, Michael, Elaine, and I, my aunts and uncles, Mama. But it wasn't the sad occasion I had imagined it would be. But maybe we didn't really say goodbye. Maybe we just brought a piece of Grandma home with us to be with us, to remind us that she is always with us in spirit, in our memories.

Quietness

2008-02-02T22:59:00.000-05:00

The last three nights have been so quiet! The "boys" are in New Orleans for Mardi Gras. The band marched in their first parade today--the Krewe of Iris. They march in Mid-City tomorrow. They will be gone until Monday night, traveling all night, and returning Tuesday morning. Until then, I'm on my own. Tomorrow will be the first day I will have that is truly my own. I don't know what exactly I will do do. I know I should go to church, but I may play "hooky" and do something I want to do. I'm fighting off some chest congestion and cough. I may be home just to keep my germs to myself!

John came home this afternoon to feed the dogs and the furnace. Gramps is taking care of the furnace while I'm gone. He does visit the dogs as well!

A Threat of Snow--again

2008-01-25T22:42:00.000-05:00

I think we've set a record with threats of winter weather this month! We've had a forecast of some form of freezing participation every week. I'm beginning to wish we'd hurry up and get the stuff and get it over with!

I am ready for a break--a long vacation from school and from everything else. I want to have time for me, to walk, to scrap, to create. I think the scrapbooking is not always so much about telling a story as it is about creating. That's the thing. The work has to "speak." I have a "Believe" album that I haven't finished. That's on my list of things to do this weekend--work on assembling and finishing the album. I have some new papers to play with as well.

I read in one of the blogs today that saying no to some things is saying yes to other things. I think that's a lesson that I need to learn more completely--to say no to some things so that I can say yes to other things. I need to say yes to me more often. I have to find time this weekend so that I do the creating that I need to do.

Acceptance

2008-01-09T06:54:00.000-05:00

Yesterday did not go as I had planned, but that's OK. I intended to spend the afternoon working on my "Believe" album and scrapbooking a layout based on the picture I have of Linda, Jane, and me, taken at our graduation from Newberry College. I didn't do either. I ended up helping John exchange his laptop speakers in Columbia, taking Aaron to the orthodontist, getting Chinese food for supper. I did get some time to write in my journal. Even though my plans didn't work out, and I am content. I have to accept sometimes that my plans are not always going to fall into place. I need to be more Spirit-led, though. And perhaps that was the point of yesterday--to let the Spirit lead me to do what is best for my soul and my peace. I am content. I am not frustrated that I didn't get the work done that I wanted to do. I am ready for the next time--maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow--maybe next week. It's okay.

I really need to change the name of my blog.

2008-01-08T08:41:00.000-05:00

Yep, I need to change it, but I'm not very creative in that department. I can't come up with a snappy title.

It was an interesting weekend, to say the least. John moved into his dorm at Newberry College--a transfer student from Clemson, almost, not quite, starting over. For him it is a "first day" of school because he's starting a new school and a new program. He is excited. The interesting thing about moving him in is--he is living in my old dorm and in the room next door to my old room! How cool is that! As I looked around Smeltzer Hall second floor, I saw how many changes there were, and yet how much the same it is after 28 years. I felt at home there, even in this new world of coed dorms! Things have really changed! Newberry College with coed dorms! Then my roommate Linda sent me a photo taken at our graduation--Jane, me, and Linda (from left to right). That really brought back memories--Jane making me a blouse designed to "knock the socks off" of Wally, the late night chats with Linda, Linda introducing me to Styx and Queen (not in my repertoire back then--I was almost strictly classical in those days!), panty raids in the middle of the night, get-togethers on the weekend with Jim and Dean bringing their guitars for "pickin' and grinnin'", Saturday night football in our finest (who would ever have thought of dressing UP to go to a football game--skirt, heels, hose--Sunday finest!), Susie and Reva's antics. Oh gosh! And then the reality. Jane is gone: she died in September 2006 (almost 2 years! It doesn't seem that long!), an aneurysm burst during a Sunday morning worship. She was gone before she could be taken to the hospital. So young. . . .

And at the copy machine yesterday, Dell and I were talking about last week. One of her in-laws had to be taken to the hospital. The doctors know that there is blood on the brain, and they think she had an aneurysm to rupture. She is talking and she is alert, but Dell remarked that she couldn't help but think about Jane. I wonder why the two of us, with such different experiences last week, both had the same person in our thoughts.

Now, today--MY day--I'll take Aaron to the orthodontist shortly, and then it's my day to create!

One more thing: I started the "overlooked challenge"--taking a picture of things that I normally overlook because they are common. Today's photo is of one of my favorite mugs, the Blue Willow mug I got from Winn Dixie several years ago. With it is one of my favorite kinds of tea: Spiced Indian Chai. I just had a cup with biscotti--so good.

One Little Word for 2008

2007-12-30T19:57:00.000-05:00

Last year, I thought about the idea of "joy"--of finding joy in everyday things, not just the "big" things. The year was difficult, especially as we are learning how to live with Grady's bipolar condition. As I read the Bible and other books, I am learning that I need to rejoice in all things, to be thankful in all things. I am grateful that there is medical help and medication that can help Grady.

So, this year, what will my word be? Should I continue seeking joy, or something else? Balance is something I need to find as well--a way to balance my personal and professional lives, my public and private lives. Maybe, just maybe if I can find that balance, I will also find even more joy.

Another word is "create." I want to work on my creativity in various ways. I've had two weeks I could have done something creative, and I didn't do that much. I did make the gratitude journals, but that's it. I don't know what I'll get up to tomorrow, other than clean up the house again. So my two words to think about: balance and create. I just need to make a decision.

The Aftermath

2007-12-29T00:10:00.000-05:00

The big push to Christmas is over, and I feel like I can breathe again. I feel so Grinchy this time of year--grouchy and un-Christmasy. I'm always so glad when the "Day" is over, and I can settle back into a routine. We still have a couple of family commitments--Uncle Lee's tomorrow afternoon, the Fulmer dinner after church on Sunday (I still have to plan my menu for that!). I need to take something to Uncle Lee's as well, even though it's not required.

John leaves in the morning to go to Clemson for the Peach/Chick Fila Bowl game. I noticed that one of the meals on game day is Chick Fila sandwiches! I should have figured that one out! Next week, he goes to Newberry College. I hope everything is in place for him to make a smooth transfer. If not, then Bill Long and Doctor Mac will have a LOT of fun making things happen for him. I'm not worried. I have to get ready for school as well on Wednesday. I'm glad it's a workday.

I'm working on some little gratitude journals to give to family members this weekend to start the new year. I'm hoping it will help me keep my focus throughout the year. I like the ones I'm making better than the one I started earlier at Thanksgiving, but I'll keep using mine! I just have to remember to write something every day--or at least take time each week to remember seven things for which I am thankful.

I'll get some pictures tomorrow. It's getting late tonight--or rather it's too early this morning.

Christmas Day in the Morning

2007-12-22T19:31:00.000-05:00

Christmas mornings were magical times for us. One of the earliest Christmases I remember was in the "old house" where we lived with Grandmother and Granddaddy. I was about six, my sister was five, and my brother was a year old. That year, James got a jeep and his beloved stuffed dog, Puppy--and the measles. We have a picture of James sitting on the jeep holding Puppy. It wasn't long after that that Elaine and I got the measles at the same time. Both of us were sick! That was also the year that Elaine and I received our first Bibles from Grandmother and Granddaddy. The next Christmas we spent in the "new house."

I was the sleepless one on Christmas Eve. Our church had not yet begun the tradition of Christmas Eve services so we spent the evening at home. Mama tried to get us to settle down and sleep, but we often woke up very early on Christmas morning--before dawn--sometimes as early as 4:00 a.m. It got so bad that Mama made the rule that we could not get out of bed before 6:30! I discovered the "truth" about Santa when I caught Mama and Daddy putting together our bicycles. Even though I now knew the truth, I was still as excited as ever about Christmas morning. It was still magical.

Now, we have to make similar rules for our own sons--no Christmas presents before 6:30 or 7:00. Aaron, the younger of the two boys, knows the truth about Santa, but he still so desperately wants to believe in him. I want to help my sons keep the spirit of Santa, the spirit of loving generosity and unselfishness. Yet, each year it gets harder and harder to keep the commercialism out of Christmas.

So, three days before Christmas, I will try to remember the magic of Christmas.

On the second day of vacation. . . .

2007-12-18T08:02:00.000-05:00

My true love wouldn't wake up to go to work! He asked me to reset the clock, which I did, and then the rascal actually did get up and go in for the early time! Argh!

The boys will be hunting this morning with their granddaddy. I'm going to stay put, I think. I want to create something, but I don't know what. I want to play with my scrapbook toys, especially the new papers and the new cricut software. Hopefully, the boys will find a tree today, and we can put up the tree. I think I will venture out to Walmart this mroning to find some new ornaments and a new stand.

So much to do. . . . But I'm not going to worry about perfection. I am going to try to enjoy the holidays and the time with the boys.

On the first day of vacation. . . .

2007-12-17T08:20:00.000-05:00

It's time for Christmas holidays. Today is the first workday vacation day. I'm the first one up--as usual, except for Grady, who is at work. I've had my scones and am sipping my cup of hot spiced chai this morning. I'll get my everyday clothes on shortly and begin cleaning. It's time to put the Christmas tree up for this year. Each year, it seems I get Grinchy at Christmas time. I don't look forward to the hustle and bustle of shopping and decorating. I enjoy the church Christmas programs--the children singing, the adult choir cantata; I enjoy looking at the colorful Christmas lights with my family. I just don't like the bustle and feeling of hurry-up-and-get-it-done that comes with this season. I lose my focus this time of year. I want this season to be simple--to focus on the family, not the size of the presents; the unselfishness of giving rather than the "I want the biggest, best, most expensive thing you can give me." I want Christmas to be generative season of miracles of creation, not commercial advertisements.

I'm looking out the deck window now. The morning light has the trees shining in gold against the light blue sky. Most of the limbs are bare now; it's winter, and it's cold this morning. Yet that golden light is warming. Today is a new day--a day to start over, to capture my focus again, to slow down and enjoy today--with all it's bustle and business and boys-bickering-ness. Today I will be thankful for this golden time.

Christmas Traditions--Writing Challenge 5

2007-12-12T20:07:00.000-05:00

What are the traditional gifts that I have received? I remember the dolls--walking dolls, baby dolls, fashion dolls. . . . Elaine and I always received the same doll. The only difference was my dolls always had brown hair; Elaine's had blond hair. Even the fashion dolls--Francie and Chrissie were brunette and blond, respectively. I remember having the walking dolls, the ones that didn't exactly walk the way they were supposed to, but I don't remember receiving it--which Christmas. We may have still lived in the trailer then. I do remember the Chatty Kathy dolls. There was a pull cord in the back which made the doll talk. Of course, it didn't take long for the cords to break. We also received little dolls, Heidi, I think were the names. That was the only blond doll I ever received! One year, instead of dolls, Elaine and I received teddy bears, I think the same year James received Puppy. I'm not exactly sure where the teddy bears are now. My walking doll and Chatty Cathy are at Mama's. Georgia played with those dolls when she was old enough.

Other traditional gifts--Granddady and Grandmother Summer gave me my first Bible when I was six years old. Granddaddy gave me my birthstone ring when I was about 12 or so. I also remember getting a beautiful book of fairy tales from Granddaddy. Clothes are also high on the list of traditional gifts at Christmas. Granddaddy Wessinger always rolled dollar bills in wrapping paper and hung the rolls on the Christmas tree. It was always a dollar bill! As he aged, the was unable to make the tight rolls the way he had when we were younger.

I'm not sure my children have received "traditional" gifts. We've usually gone for the BIG gift, though, for our children, the things that we wouldn't buy for them during the year. However, at my parents', the boys always get clothing for some sort--a very traditional gift.

The Photo I Wish Someone Had Taken

2007-12-11T21:46:00.000-05:00

The children's table in Grandma's kitchen--whenever we gathered to eat--the whole Wessinger clan--the grandchildren always ate at the kitchen table. We used the everyday dishes and flatware and glasses. We had no serving dishes at our table; we served our plates from the grownups' table. My cousins, Virginia, Franklin, and Janet; my sister Elaine and brother James; the younger, and "newer" cousins, Michael, Jason, and Denise, crowded around the kitchen table for our own feast. We didn't mind, though, for it was there that we had our own version of "grownup talk." Even when we got older and were invited to the grownup table, we still chose to eat in the kitchen. What I remember most about the kitchen is the warmth of the kitchen. There was a small Ashley wood stove where Grandma would put pots full of cooked food to keep warm in the winter. There was the cool pantry where she stored her canned goods and some dry goods--the flour bin with its metal scoop one the fixtures in the pantry. There was something "special" about having a pantry in the house, though it was small. Her cabinets were built low, especially for her. I don't think she was even five feet tall! The chairs around the table were an assortment of seating furniture--stools, chairs with woven cane seats, wood ladderback chairs. Even those chairs were of different heights to accommodate the various heights of everyone who sat at that table.

It would be nice now to have a picture of all nine cousins together. The girls tended to outnumber the boys, but no one minded.

Now, almost 30 years after that house and that kitchen burned to the ground, I realize how close we were and how far apart we are now. Virginia sufferes from a degenerative neurological disease that is taking her mobility away almost daily. Franklin lives in North Carolina, and we rarely see him even on holidays. Janet is more likely to visit during family times. Michael, Jason, and Denise all live close by. But we all have our own lives, and those days around the kitchen table are rarer and rarer.

However, there is a new kitchen table for us in the new house. Other people gather around that table as well--the in-laws: Wade Padgett, Holly Wessinger, Jason's wife, Allan Tapp, Denise's husband. . . . And now, there are great-grandchildren: John, Aaron, Georgia, Caroline, John Lewis, and his brother, Alyssa and her new brother/sister. This year, when we have the Wessinger get together at Uncle Lee's, I need to take the picture of the kitchen table and the cousins who will sit there together.